Of all the aspects you bring as a speaker – informally at a status meeting, formally as a conference presenter – which attributes you think is most important?
Some would say engaging, others would add being relevant, motivating, or enthusiastic. Eventually someone brings up something that gets everyone’s agreement, but at the same, it’s one of the most difficult to do: being authentic.
The most common elements – engagement, relevancy, motivation, enthusiasm, among others– are easier to define (and teach) because they’re specific.
Authenticity is different because it begins with something intrinsic: something inside the speaker. No matter how good the coach or mentor, the speaker is the only one who can make this attribute come alive. Along with charisma – another unteachable attribute (although there are plenty of books that say otherwise) – the element of authenticity intrigues me because I think they’re the ultimate goals of the best speakers. They sell their ideas with such ease. But how do you teach a person to be “real” or “genuine”?
It’s an idea I’ve been obsessed about, to the point that I’ve gone through research and interviewed good speakers to try and define ” authenticity,” whether demonstrated in an auditorium, across a boardroom table, through a Zoom call, or over a cup of coffee.
#1. You are you.
It begins with utterly knowing yourself. If you don’t know who you are, what you stand for, how can you be authentic to the audience?
There’s a truth to being you. It’s more than knowing your topic, having credibility, being experienced with wisdom or age – although they all help. It requires self-examination, but not done to be egotistical. It’s to have a crystal-clear perception of yourself. That’s why being filmed in training is so vital to some people. You must know how you come across before you can be authentic. And, once you do see yourself, you can make some key decisions about what to do.
# 2. You are you … every single time.
Once you know yourself, it’s about repetition and consistency: your personality, behaviours, beliefs, ideals, values.
It’s true what my Nana Eklund used to say. You have to know what you know. If you don’t, you can’t repeat it. If you can’t repeat it, you can’t get better. The most authentic speakers I know have a clear sense of their strengths (to repeat them) and their weaknesses (either to neutralise them or find ways to make them strengths.)
It’s also a demonstration between what the speaker believes and how they behave. The audience sees the difference. It’s captured perfectly in “Talk the talk, walk the walk.”
I recently saw the reverse of this. A senior leader was watching a video of their presentation, and they said afterward: “I wasn’t stepping into my Performance Mode.” Meaning, they were one way off-camera, but the moment they hit the lights, they needed to turn into someone else.
This is the definition of a façade. And, I have two questions for them:
- Why be two different people?
- Which one are we supposed to believe?
The second question is moot. The answer is: Neither.
Try this instead. Be genuinely one person. It’s so much easier.
#3. You ‘know what you say,’ not ‘say everything you know.’
The most authentic business presenters are pro-active and concise. They state a definitive opinion, recommendation, or hypothesis. Their rationale and evidence is clear, explicit, and appropriate. They choose words which sound natural coming out of their mouth. As a whole package, it’s most believable and credible.
Less authentic presenters give status reports or executive summaries. They talk about the past. One of the most influential people in my life (a colleague at MasterCard, then my client at ANZ Bank) uses to say: “Don’t tell me what the number is, tell me what the number means.”
Tell me what we should be doing in the future. And make it specific, clear and actionable. Don’t be afraid to be unpopular. Speak transparently and honestly. avoid speaking in . Believe in what you say, and take responsibility for saying it.
That’s a lot to do, but then again, that’s what good leaders do.
#4. You are fearless.
To be authentic means you are fearless. Perhaps the most difficult task of this point is to make complexity simple. Think of the smartest person you’ve ever met. Isn’t that they do? Make complexity simple to understand? That means you have to cut out the bullshit and minutiae. Trust your command of the facts and details. Trust yourself.
I get lots of push-back from this point, primarily from people who have a difficult relationship with their supervisor/boss/client. I hear things like:
- “My boss doesn’t want my opinion, even if they ask”
- “They’ve already made their decision. I’m only justifying their POV”
- “They’re setting me up to be wrong in public”
In individual situations, these may be true. But the most authentic speakers are definitive and right. They’re not indecisive nor vague. Even as a middle ground, wouldn’t it be more authentic to be fearless but wrong, rather than silent and indecisive? Authentic speakers avoid nothing.
#5. You are passionate.
You’re the only person who will make your topic interesting. PowerPoint or Keynote might look attractive and dazzle the eye on the stage or page, but people aren’t persuaded to change their behaviour based on what they read or see. One of my favourite lines, from another favourite mentor: “If you need PowerPoint to give you a personality, we have a much bigger problem at hand.”
Your words – delivered by you, in ways which engage the audience through body technique, eye contact, voice and gestures – are what change people’s attitude, opinion and behaviour. Authentic people work at exciting their audiences, and the number one way to do this is to talk about what’s important to the audience – not talk about themselves.
Lots of people think they’re ready to present their recommendations or POVs because they wrote their slides. That is absolutely not true. You need to translate what a slide says to what the audience needs to know, especially if we’re watching the speaker read their own slides. Their credibility is ruined, and their authenticity disappears.
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. The only thing you carry with you your entire life is your reputation. As they say on RuPaul’s Drag Race: Don’t fuck it up.
What other attributes do you think it means to be authentic? Feel free to add your thoughts and comments below.
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